Rough day

So now my previously totally excited about preschool kid is the crying kid. The past three times she's been at school, her eyes give her away when I pick her up and I already know she's spent the morning crying.

and apparently today, she tried to make a run for it and shot straight out the door when her dad dropped her off in her classroom. thankfully, her teacher (let's call her mrs. m2) caught her. they distracted her on and off but then the waterworks started again on the playground.

belly's class got out to the playground first, and as soon as bulilit's class went out, the two of them were all smiles and playing with each other. when it was time for belly's class to go in -- before bulilit's class -- the tears started. FOR BOTH OF THEM. i guess i should be happy that they love each other and just want to be together?

mrs. m2 also told me a cute little story about the girls running into each other at the bathroom. bulilit was washing her hands, mrs. m2 was waiting for her and belly sees the picture in mrs. m2's hands. (it's a picture of our family, which belly and bulilit use as their "lovey")

belly: um, i think you should give that back to bulilit.
mrs. m2: i think so too. i was just holding it so it wouldn't get wet!

thank you, my little bossy belly.

then at pick up, one of bulilit's classmates pointed at her and told me, very matter of factly, "She was crying for you today." and thank you too, little two-year old.

I guess as a consequence to all these feelings of abandonment and separation anxiety, bulilit has been spending a lot of time in my office. she had seen her sister playing sesame street games on the macbook (which, incidentally, are the best toddler games I've found on the Internet) so she wanted to play them too. i tried not to pay too much attention, but couldn't hold back my laughter when i heard this:

elmo's voice: if you want to do it again, click the mouse!
bulilit: okay, hold on. i click you, mouse.

the curse of the ipod touch

so smarie once told me she had a theory that ipod touches are cursed. apparently everyone she knows who has a touch has either had it stolen or lost it. and that's definitely been true for us. i've killed two touches already and e can't find his.

UPDATE! i found e's touch in my work backpack. still trying to figure out how it got there. AND, i'm planning to get the new iPod touch (4th gen?) using some bonus points i got from work. hope this one doesn't meet the same fate as my last two!!

rainy days and mondays (to the tune of the carpenters)

monday
fml. 2 ipod touches dead in the span of 7 months. both from water damage. apparently, nanny found my touch in the sink today. belly first blamed the nanny then said she did it. but how much do i trust the words of an almost 3 year old?

also, it was raining today. which pretty much guarantees that it's going to be *that kind of day. so i can't really think of much to be thankful for, other than e deciding to work from home today. i told him, even when we're not talking to each other, just sitting in the same room working, or taking a break to have lunch together, or - and especially this - having his help as soon as nanny leaves for the day... it's just the best.

oh, and these beautiful roses (sent from my cousin-slash-ballerina's mom for my birthday) which have finally opened up to excessively large blooms. just gorgeous.

sunday
since we spent the weekend at my parents' house, i got to take a couple naps and catch up on some much needed sleep. plus, as i was laying in bed, got to take some time for myself to catch up on some blogs via my super fun phone, which i'm finally learning to love.

blog fail.

Monday, May 10
Wow. Has it really been a week? Oops. I don't think the frequency will get any better -- in fact, it will likely become worse as summer really kicks off and we have a truckload of different events coming up (you should see our family google calendar).

Anyways... thankful today for drama-free bath time, e coming home early. Also, you know I can never resist sharing a baby story ... tonight, after reading books, belly asks me, 'what do you want for your birthday?' and then when i said all i wanted was a big kiss from her and her sister, she said, 'how about i get you a dora toy?'


Sunday, May 9
Happy Mother's Day!!! Still at the beach, windy and cold today so no sitting on the sand before we leave. Of course, I'm thankful for my mama. Duh. And for waking up to my husband and daughter handing me a card and giving me a kiss. (As I get kicked in the back/ribs/face by younger daughter who takes up the entire bed. Her way of telling me she loves me!)


Saturday, May 8
Drove up to the beach last night to spend the weekend in the sun, sand and surf. Kids woke up early, per usual, and we headed out at 9am. The sun was warm, the water was freezing. But that didn't deter bulilit from walking as fast as her little legs could take her right into said freezing water. belly seemed much more happy sitting (ahem, squatting, ahem) in the sand, building sand castles.

Thankful for my parents taking the kids while we were at the outlets, so that e and i could walk around together in a vain attempt for him to buy me a birthday present. mission=fail. i seem to enjoy buying things for the kids moreso than for myself. (Can you blame me? How much cuter are little girl clothes than clothes in sizes I don't want to admit I wear?!)


Friday, May 7
On the way to ballet this morning, this is what I heard.
Conversations between 2 years olds, part 1
Ballerina (b2): What's that, Belly?
Belly (b1): A book.
b2: where'd you get it?
b1: from ami. from ami's house. i will get you one too.
b2: no, you're a silly bird.

Conversations between 2 years olds, part 2
b2: hey! belly has sunglasses! i don't have sunglasses.
me: maybe you can ask your mommy to get you some for your birthday.
b1: i will get you sunglasses, ballerina.

Conversations between 2 years olds, part 3
me: belly, share your snack with ballerina
b1: here, ballerina.
b2: thanks, belly.
b1: sure.
b2: belly, can i have some more?
b1: sure. (hands ballerina the cup of froot loops.) can i have it back please?
(Quiet, chewing)
b1: oh no! there are no more blues!!
b2: i see one!
b1: where?
b2: there!
b1: where?!
b2: there!!
b1: where? i don't see it!
b2: on the side? THERE!
b1: oh.

Thursday, May 6
Yay! Laptop is fixed!

Today, I was thankful for dinner at red robin - courtesy of my parents who are back from vacation - and the start of all the free food that comes along with my birthday and being part of a million mailing lists. looking forward to maggie moos next!


Wednesday, May 5
Happy cinco de mayo! too bad i don't celebrate. I'm writing this post like 5 days later so...
Thankful for a short nap and sunshine. Not thankful for the virus that I somehow got on my laptop.


Tuesday, May 4
peace and quiet. there.

friday, 4/23
uh, duh, ballet for the girls. but today's class was ~special~ ... i was watching the girls dance (or not dance, as the case may be), and turned away as they were putting away the ballet barres so i could respond to a text from my boss. i look up and see the teacher carrying belly who is sobbing. i turn to the mommy next to me and say, "ok, i'm awful and totally missed that. what happened?" apparently, belly got herself stuck between barres as they were putting them away and the other kids kept pushing and pushing, leaving belly squished. ahh, the dangers of ballet.

i was also thankful today for lots of visitors--surprise and expected. former nanny came to visit with new baby boy, and the girls were very nice with him. belly even bounced him in her old bouncy and was singing him to sleep. then, sis2be arrived earlier than expected at the airport and since she had a 3+ hour layover, I picked her up so she could see the girls (and her own sister, who was in the area too) and have lunch. bulilit was showing off her walking skills for her auntie.

speaking of bulilit... it's never a good sign when the kids are quiet, but it was adorable to watch bulilit occupy herself for a good half an hour playing with a bottle liner and pail. when she then moved on to something a little more destructive -- which she tends to do on occasion (ok, more like all the time) -- you can't get mad at her because she looks up at you with the brightest eyes and cutest smile. melts my heart every. single. time.


thursday, 4/22
i'm sitting outside on the playground while the kids play and i work. i love that the playground is right behind our house and that my wi-fi extends out here. :)

i know i appear super focused with my laptop on my lap, but why is it so hard to crack that neighborhood mommy circle? (e would say it's because i'm too shy.) i just think it's funny that all the neighborhood kids and their moms know my kids' names... but probably have no idea what mine is.

after a couple hours playing on the playground -- and letting belly and bulilit roam the grassy hills on their own -- i deposited them both in the tub. thankfully, e got in with them and distracted belly enough for her to stop crying and screaming. (i tease that she's just like her ninong, who hated baths with a passion as a kid.) bulilit, on the other hand, needs no encouragement and the other day almost went head first into the tub in her excitement to get into the bath. hilarious. when i went to pull her out last night, she looked at me with her best, "i don't think so" look and firmly shook her head. as we finished getting them ready for bed, i realized my kids get their hair blow dried more than i do.



wednesday, 4/21
have i mentioned how much i love cuddling with my kids? belly gives me hugs and cuddles almost whenever i ask, but bulilit is a little more stingy about it. so cuddling with her is extra special. and it's so cute to watch her exploring her new independence gained by toddling around on her own. the smile on her face as she realizes she's getting further and further is beyond compare.

also had a long chat with my brother ... happy that even though they are thousands of miles away and the girls don't get to spend as much time with him as they used to, we can still talk and gossip and bounce ideas off each other. (yes, cheesy, i know.)

one more thing i was thankful for on tuesday... i was really ready to throw my hands up in frustration and surrender, because life is really overwhelming right now. my cousin forwarded me an email that contained this chart, which, at the moment, was EXACTLY what i needed to read/hear. god truly does work in mysterious ways...

distracted

typing this up as i watch my new moon blu ray for the first time since i bought it. haha...

today began pretty crappy, but definitely turned into a very good day. belly played by herself, drawing pictures and reading books to herself, out loud. then she shows me the pictures and she's drawn legit happy faces. one of them even had little stick arms and stick legs and she proudly told me, 'this is bulilit!' ah-dor-able.

i took the kids to the playground after nanny left, and bulilit did her usual circuit of climbing up the stairs, inching her way backwards toward the slide and then sliding down the curvy slide on her belly, feet first. she did it literally 10 times. again, ah-dor-able.

because it was so nice outside, we decided to have a picnic dinner. so as soon as e got home, we pulled out the picnic basket, wrapped up all the food, grabbed a blanket and laid it out in the sunshine. it was awesome. belly ate an entire piece of fried chicken by herself -- and bulilit must've been jealous because she too grabbed a chicken leg and was chomping on it. one of the best evenings i've had in a while.

sunday, april 18

• good deals at old navy and children's place
• words with friends on my ipod touch

saturday, april 17

• breakfast at bk. those burger shots are just the right size for the kids. too bad it's so not healthy.
• car wash for my mommy car. finally seeing the sleek silver instead of the sticky, yellow-green pollen.
• spa week - got a facial for the first time in 3 years and my skin feels all baby soft

ok, back to new moon!

my house smells like tocino

cooked brinner tonight (a/k/a breakfast for dinner). tocino, eggs and rice. tocilog, without the sinaangag. (sp?) and smelling the house makes me nostalgic and reminds me of growing up. it's funny how certain smells remind you of different times of your life (like how cool water and hugo boss will forever remind me of senior year high school and fresh cut grass reminds me of grade school, in the spring, when we'd have to shut the windows at the first sniff of cut grass due to one classmate's debilitating allergies. random, huh?).

didn't get to post last night because i was smack in the middle of two kids, passed out on our bed. e went to a hockey game with coworkers so i had to attempt to put both girls down for bed. luckily, it went easier than i expected (e feared he'd come home at 11 to all 3 of us, still awake). thank goodness for fios on demand and for 'hush little baby' for helping get the girls to sleep.

between when they fell asleep and when e got home, i caught up on some tv, including dancing with the stars, general hospital and last week's vampire diaries. oh. em. gee. for reals. so many bombs dropped and tiny secrets revealed here and there... seriously, my guilty pleasure that is SO GOOD.

anyways, we didn't have the heart to move them once they were passed out, so all 4 of us slept in the bed and, after bulilit's usual midnight waking, all of us slept through the night! girls didn't wake each other or us up until 7:30.

today, i'm thankful for the 30 minutes of peace and quiet i had (plus 15 min driving each way). happy almost easter!

sitting in the sunshine, feeling the breeze

i love spring (well, except for the allergies!). i'm sitting in my backyard, computer on my lap, working away. while last week was sunny and warm, it was cold and rainy the past couple days. so now that the sun is back out i am basking in it.

i am thankful for bulilit's wide-eyed innocence and wonder at the littlest things. while we were sitting on the playground, she was sitting on the edge, completely entranced by the wood chips, picking them up and running them through her fingers. makes me wistful, as i sit here with what feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders.

yesterday, i was thankful for where we live, because the community playground is literally in our backyard. so we were out there for awhile, and didn't have to come in until almost 7pm because it didn't require a long trek back the house. (and yay for belly and bulilit's playground friends!!)

eta, also thankful for e. pretty much every day but especially on 3/24. he knows why.

hilarious

after a very rough week, both personally and professionally, I really needed a good laugh.

As usual, I turned to YouTube. Currently laughing while i watch manny pacquiao singing on jimmy kimmel. And this video never fails to make me laugh. out. loud. belly watched it yesterday without me knowing--i could hear her giggling and looked over at my ipod to see what was making her laugh.



this morning i laughed while watching belly at her ballet class. the other kids were running around, not paying attention, and there she is, on the floor, following her teacher's direction, laying on her tummy with legs up and crossed, hands on her cheeks and moving her head from side to side. and right before that, on the ballet barre, doing her kicks with hands on her hips, just like her teacher. too. cute.

so i'm thankful for laughter today. because, honestly, how would we survive??

random: I've already outed myself with the Vampire Diaries love. So thanks boo for sharing this link with me.

it's been awhile

oops. guess i haven't updated in more than a few days. i have an excuse though, and this one is legitimate, and not just some rationalization. bulilit has been sick. and i mean, really sick. poor baby spiked a fever of 104.3 last sunday night, seemingly out of nowhere.

we had a rough week, starting with a doctors appointment (note to readers: if you have to get a urine sample from an infant/toddler, be prepared to wait a few hours. infants do not like to pee on demand) that netted nothing since the tests all came back negative; vomiting monday night; fever breaking for about 12 hours on tuesday and then suddenly reappearing at 3 in the morning... cue sleep-deprived haze here.

so i guess i need to list out, hmm, 10 things? that i am thankful for... wow that's a lot, haha. And since I'm operating in that not-quite-totally-here daze from the craziness that was last week I don't think I can list one thing from each day that I'm thankful for. So here's a random assortment which I'm sure maps back to those days, but I'm not sure how.

1. toddler speak/toddlerisms. Belly's saying of the week, "Mommy, don't see me. I'm going to do something bad." Also, whenever we read her Yo Gabba Gabba book, she looks at the title page and says, "That's a big Muno. That's kinda scary."


2. Other blogs, like Rants from Mommyland , the Meanest Mom, Beltway Babywearers and The Plan. The Plan linked to this article from Cooking Light about common kitchen mistakes. Bookmarking for future reference! (Full disclosure, one of my good friends from work co-authors The Plan.)

3. Super thankful for Bulilit finally feeling better with no more fever and no more vomiting. But we still don't know what caused the fever.

4. Skype and Tokbox. Belly and bulilit got to talk to the grandparents and their godfather-slash-uncle who are all on the left coast.

5. Sounds like my previous entry, but thankful for having lunch with a former boss. i don't think i ever really appreciated how important it is to maintain relationships even after you're no longer working together.

6. A throwback to my high school days... General Hospital. Don't get to watch as much as I used to (which was RELIGIOUSLY in high school, for the Robin/Stone storyline) but I'll catch them every once in while on YouTube. And omg, Friday's episode had Robin talking about Stone again. *heart flutters* Seriously, it's the silliest thing, but that ep hasn't been deleted from the DVR. Totally plan on watching it again.

7. Speaking of things still on my DVR, i heart vampire diaries. totally my guilty pleasure. fun storylines (after a verrry slow start) and eye candy, what more could you ask for?

8. Girl scout cookies. 'Nuff said.


9. This one is actually tied to a specific day, Saturday the 27th. I'm thankful for friendly people. While at the mall, we were booking it from Children's Place to Auntie Anne's to get a drink before heading to church. Once we got to Auntie Anne's, realized that bulilit was no longer wearing a sock or shoe on her left foot. So I retrace our footsteps and there's a pink sock not 500 feet from us. I keep walking, thinking, man, the grandparents are going to be upset, we lost an expensive Janie & Jack shoe!, when a nice man taps me on the arm and says, it's right outside Aldo. i must've had the harried, worried expression on my face that only another a parent would recognize. As I get closer to Aldo, a mom says to me, we just passed it, it's right there by the shoe store. How ironic, I think to myself. And there it is, a fuzzy pink boot just waiting for me to find it. And I laugh to myself thinking, well bulilit has just put a new spin on an old story my parents liked to tell about me when I was little. Apparently, with the windows down, riding in the car, I decided to throw my shoe out the window of a moving car. Which made me really earn the nickname I'd had from near birth -- cinderella. So now the tradition lives on with bulilit!

10. Another one tied to the actual day.. Sunday, 2/28, another day, another mall. Thankful that E took both kids to the play area so I could have 30 minutes of kid-free shopping and personal grooming. :) I'd kind of forgotten how nice quiet shopping could be!

it's the little things...

i'm tellin ya...

• warm showers
• scrabble and internet on my ipod touch
• finally getting youtube to work on my new htc phone

But most of all, i'm thankful to be celebrating my second daughter's first birthday tomorrow, with both sets of grandparents with belly, E and me. (only wish both godfathers and sister/sis2be were celebrating with us too. stupid snowstorm.)

oh, and a funny story of being snowed in at my parents' house... i was in my old room, doing some work, unaware of where my children were, when my phone rings. i look at the screen and wonder if my mom realizes she is calling me. i pick up and hear a tiny, quiet, "hello?" it's belly, calling me to ask where i am. she hands the phone to her sister and says, "it's mommy, bulilit." so i'm talking to them as i walk to my parents' room, and as i open the door, she stares at me with a look of utter disbelief, looks at the phone, then looks to me again. clearly, she is confused. my mom and i find this hilarious. :)

la la la la

i am thankful for music. i am so behind the curve that i've only recently discovered pandora, last.fm and playlist.com. and between these three sites, i'm discovering a lot of new music, in genres i never thought i'd be into. and who knew taylor swift had so. many. songs. (i had to delete her as one of the artists in my pandora playlist, under my 'teen pop' label, because i felt like every other song was hers. when i only really like you belong with me. and yes, i do have a 'teen pop' label on pandora. what can i say, i will forever be a bubblegum pop fan...)

anyways, my current faves on repeat at the moment include

• holly brook, what i wouldn't give
• sara bareilles, gravity
• bright eyes, first day of my life
• britney, 3
• ne-yo, never knew i needed
• kelly clarkson, empty handed
• kris allen, falling slowly
• lykke li, possibility
• the entire glee soundtrack(s). haha

told you it was random!

My 365 Days of Thanks - day 1

I hate new year's resolutions. I've made many in the past and almost always abandon them within weeks. This year, I want to make a conscious effort to be happier and appreciate all the blessings that I have, because I know there are many. And usually, the things that make me happiest each day are the little things.

I remember in high school, during sophomore retreat, we were given journals with inspirational quotes, pictures and the instruction to start a "happy list." I remember passing the journal around to friends, and receiving their journals, to create pages on whatever they wanted to share -- more quotes, memories of our friendship, recipes for cherry pie and collages. Seeing that journal now, all beat up, never fails to bring a smile to my face.

So I'm starting this blog to keep track of things I am grateful for everyday.

Today, January 26, I am thankful for:

• email on my phone, so that I can check email while i'm in bed, nursing a sick baby